Friday, June 15, 2012

Me After 31st May 2012

Its a sacred date..no no its THE sacred date.

maybe some of u already knew that i actually tendered my resignation effective on 31st May 2012.

So currently i am...jobless?in between jobs? happy?relieved?

Seriously i don't know.

Why i tender?Its not an easy decision to make. But i did it anyway.

Errr..maybe i had enough?may be i am bored?maybe im looking for something more?

To be honest its all of the above..and some other reasons.

Maybe im stupid. Maybe im taking a BIG risk. Maybe im not thinking hard enough.

But i know what im doing. And i havent regret doing it so far..(yet)

I have been thinking about this for the last 2-3 months. Each time it came to my mind i tried to persuade myself to not proceed with it. Not to forget a reminder to myself that i have bills to pay, commitment to continue and gazillions other reasons. Somemore i love my colleagues, my beautiful office, my boss, and of course the fact that you will see your money growing in your bank account at the end of the month and errrr also plus the EPF.

But that did not really guaranty my happiness. All the above come like a package.. together with stress, depression, time constraint, etc etc..i did not even have time for myself let alone my husband. Always came back from work so tired and depressed about having to go to work the next morning. Friday feels like heaven but when Sunday comes,i felt demotivated. Every working day i could not wait until the end of the day to go back and be with my husband. Every morning im dragging my feet to office and yes until to the extend i fell like want to take EL all the way.. But i did not..

that i think its not worth it.

I've been telling this to my hubby and he is a good listener..He is a businessman but he is quite smart. He just work half the load i was doing and yet he earn much more. Plus he got more time for himself.

Not a good comparison? well at least that's how I see it.

Ok let me make it straight it here. I know almost ALL work/occupation/job out there will face the same nature. But some people have different level of acceptance. Mine..as you can see..very low.

When the first time I told my superior was through an email, she was so calm and replied with a thanks that i informed her in advance. The next day we had a private talk and she asked me why am i leaving. I told her that i want to do something and at the same time wont compromise on my time. i decided to help out with my hubby's business..for a start..before i really know what i want to do. She was so supportive.

So what am i going to do?

Hmmmmmm..hmmm hmmm (that's a long hmmm)

I am going to take my own sweet time to figure it out.

I have discussed it with my hubby and he's being supportive all the way. He did not stop neither encouraged me.

But Mr hubby assured me that InsyaAllah together we both can do it. Tapi kene rajin and xle putus asa.

Soooooo..on 23 & 24 this month i will start my first baby step to do it.

Still a looooong way to go..and little bit late to start..but heyyy..we can always dream right?

But i believe God has better plan for me..and if i try my best and tawakal.. Insyaallah.

Hope all this teaches me to be more mature in life.

XOXO




2 comments:

love for life said...

good luck to you and me also haha

misha.w said...

ape yg ko nak buat tu dila? share la sikit..:)